Somewhere over the rainbow is where I want to be
Somewhere My kids can stay little
Somewhere there are no worries
Somewhere it is sunny and pretty all the time
Somewhere we can play candy land and play all day
Somewhere we don't get old
Somewhere our health is always perfect
Somewhere no people talk or judge others!

With the new year I struggle with these things especially my kids growing up right before my eyes!
We watched Rocky Balboa last night and I cried like a baby because I can completely relate to it. I don't want to leave the past behind me, I think about it all the time. I don't live in the moment at all and I don't live for the future. I think of when Payton listened to Elvis and loved him, how she was so cute and she would strive to please me even though I hardly spent enough time with her. I just wanted her to grow up and be independent so it would be easy to take care of her. I think of the times I got upset with Parker when he was a tiny baby and had colic I wanted to rush time then. Every time Patton did something off the wall and I just thought if he was a little bit older I would be able to handle him better.
All of this time I missed out I wasted all my energy on the negative.
Life is a privilege and I should live it moment to moment but I think that is easier said than done. I have to work to pay the bills and I have to take care off the day to day stuff so I guess I feel like I leave the fun stuff behind. Where is the happy medium?
The future what is that really? What will my fate have in store for me and my family? I am truly thankful for what I have and for my family. I guess the future just scares the crap out of me it is the "unknown".
"Life is a journey we all must take what you make of it will define you in the end"
I hope you have the best 2010 you can! Enjoy every moment I will if you will:)